roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
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