Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Randomize
