I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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