An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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