It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
