As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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