you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
did i walk over a car last night?
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Randomize
