I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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