please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
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