it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
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