Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
