Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Randomize
