I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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