In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
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