you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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