What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize
