im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Randomize
