sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize
