i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I am mentally ready for anal.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
