You're my little dorito
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
