I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Randomize
