i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
my nose is crying tears of wow.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Randomize
