I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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