You're my little dorito
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
Randomize
