I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Come share oat with me in your robe
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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