Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
