There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
We got so high we made milksteak
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
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