Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
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