I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
