hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
