i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
