thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
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