Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Randomize