if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
