She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
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