I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
