Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
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