Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Randomize
