you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Who died my cat blue again?
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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