You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
