a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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