I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Bang-toberfest begins!!
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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