Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I deserve this hangover.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
