I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
