Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
