My friends, they love my intelligence
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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