Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
