The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
