Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
Randomize
