She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Randomize
